Ann Coulter is at it again and this time she calls Senator Patty Murray "The Stupidest Person in America."

Ann, normally you're faster on the draw. I recall seeing that woman campaigning eighteen years ago and the look of concentrated cluelessness--think on that one for a while--on her face sucked at least one year's worth of calculus right out of my brain, and I was in Texas and she in Washington State. What took you so long, Ann? If you're taking aim at elected morons there are so many bases on the way to a home run that it's tempting to get in the boot at Edwards, Biden, Rockefeller (a true dunce), Waters, Jackson Lee and others, but, Ann, never lose sight of Home Plate, the Big Enchilada, the sine qua non of stupidity, which is Senator Patty Murray.

I don't call her stupid in the sense that we call people we disagree with stupid; we're being lazy often to use such a scattershot insult. With Murray I mean stupid in the concrete sense. In the most real sense possible. I mean bag-of-hammers thick. Idiotic. Brain-dead. Clueless. I'd call her half-witted but don't want to defend myself from a defamation suit from the true half-wits of America.

Here is some research from Ann's column which gratifyingly confirms my original opinion:

[Osama bin Laden's] been out in these countries for decades, building schools, building roads, building infrastructure, building day-care facilities, building health-care facilities, and the people are extremely grateful. He's made their lives better."

This is not confirmation bias. This is merely an observation that anyone not in Washington State ought to know osmotically.

I find that Murray's major in college was "recreation." Did she study at the Mustang Ranch? Or is that a different sort of recreation? Come to think of it, that work experience would be a superlative thing to bring to Washington, which has even more than usual been turned into a bordello of congressmen each buying power and perks with your money.

So if the Mustang Ranch was her alma mater, she did bring real experience to Washington.

I am not suggesting that Senator Murray is a woman of loose morals--excepting with other people's money, lives and liberty. Based on this dimbo's record I think that you'd have to have been His O'liness in the Senate to have made more votes parting people from their money and liberty.

"... Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have greatness thrust upon them." Shakespeare's phrases, even 400 years on, have never been bettered. Replace "great" with "stupid," and you'd have a pretty good précis of Patty Murray.

Have you seen the movie Idiocracy? A man wakes up 500 years in the future and the world is being run by idiots. A professional wrestler for President. I saw bits of that movie when it came out; I saw the rest last month, and it was as pointed as The H.M.S. Pinafore.

All right, enough with the pleasurable task of calling an idiot an idiot. Back to the real pro, Ann Coulter.

True, Murray is a mom. You could also describe Hitler as a "war veteran and painter," but I think the more salient fact is that he was a German dictator.