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Thursday, April 10, 2003
A barking moonbat named Lori Bohannon abandons her own children to save everyone elses......or something. Juan Gato sets her straight.
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It just never stops. Less than 48 hours after the fall of Baghdad and the prospects for peace that that brings, storm clouds are gathering once again in yet another area:
Sources from the CIA reported that there is increasing chatter among top German officials about the possibility of invading France again, but the agency doesn’t care.
'Don’t get me wrong, it be a real shame if the German army decided to visit the Louvre”, said one anonymous White House advisor, while making the jerk-off motion in the air. “But with our all of our forces engaged in Iraq, there is really nothing we could do to stop them, nothing at all.'
Some have also questioned the wisdom of Tony Blair’s recent and almost relevant announcement, 'Unfortunately, with our military so engaged in Operation Iraqi Freedom, we would be unable to offer any of our NATO allies military support, should the snail eating sissies have yet another run-in with invaders from the East.' Then he added, 'You know what really goes good with beer? Some fresh French bread.'
For their part the French have dismissed any invasion concerns. Foreign Minister de Villepin said, 'Our relationship with Germany is at an all-time high. We have a mutual belief that only through peace can the European Union, and indeed that world advance.'
Germany replied, 'What’s the weather like on the Riviera again?'
Anonymous German officials have admitted that, though they are not a warlike people, it is getting harder to suppress the grass-roots call to invade France. 'Firstly, it’s genetic, I mean we just love invading France. Secondly, someone keeps dropping leaflets on us like this one: 'Image Oktoberfest in Paris', or 'The French: Now there’s some easy killin’, but the one that convinced me was 'Uncle Sam is looking the other way'.
Jacques Chirac has also expressed concerned over the number of websites that have sprung up recently dedicated to the destruction or conquest of France, especially www.whitehouse.gov/How_To_Invade_France, the Bush administration has urged France to remain calm. 'Most of the websites that worry the French are satire. And even though the one that is currently on White House servers is indeed a complete plan to conquer France with only a minimal effort, it’s more of a academic document, as anyone trying to execute it would need to share a common border with them.' "
I know it is poor form to post the whole thing, but they don't have permalinks over at http://haplo.blogspot.com/ ...... and there is more where this came from.
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The Chamber of Commerce membership drive is at our throats again. Two hundred and twenty five bucks for what? I would have loved to get off that cheap but I'll just keep my contribution at the extra half cent per dollar sales tax they helped hang on me.
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Wonderful! The most useless and unneeded newish building in the entire Permian Basin has an outside chance of being made only slightly less so.
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More from Victor Davis Hanson, this time in the Los Angeles Times (Link requires registration, sorry):
"But there can be no denying war's purpose or utility. Three million Afghan women are in school today and a vast Al Qaeda camp is removed because of the bravery of the U.S. Special Forces and because of the skill of our pilots -- not because of the petitions of our well-meaning pacifists. Iraq will be liberated and its 26 million people given a chance of freedom because of the courage of American teenagers in Abrams tanks, not because of "concerned" professors who chanted "no blood for oil" between lattes."
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This is why the mainstream media hates the blogosphere. It is not just it's widening audience as a source of news....it is it's long memory.
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Again, Lileks.
"I’m not stupid enough to think that we’ve just created a nation of 22 million wannabe Americans. But tonight parents can look down at their children in bed and believe they will have better lives. Not just hope for it, but believe it. Some of us call that the American Dream - hold the scare quotes, please - and we pray for the day when it’s no longer an American concept but a universal birthright.
Whatever you think we should do to get to that point, you have to admit that the sound of a cast-iron skull striking the pavement is a good way to start. And if you don’t it’s because you see some other false god on the podium, pointing at an empty heaven.
Men never seem taller than when they stand next to the prone remainders of a toppled tyrant. Someone someday will do a study of the statues the West pulled down. How they all showed a hard face to the dawn. How they all fell face first."
Read the rest here.
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The newest fragrance from Paris.
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Wednesday, April 09, 2003
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things.
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!”
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
--- Percy Bysshe Shelley
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Hey Walsingham, ease up on the Hollywood set. Think of them as clear vessels. When filled with a character or persona they have substance or at least appear to. When the role is over they cannot be called to task for the actions of a former character. The anti-war stance many of them took must be viewed in the same way; they have moved on and can’t be questioned about that role now.
In a kind of Postmodern sense they have no real substance other than when they are “in character”. The amusing aspect is that they don’t recognize this trait in themselves or in fellow actors. It should be hard to con a con-man, but in Hollywood they continue to marry each other and are surprised each time when their spouse isn’t as represented. Duh.
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BAGHDAD (AFP) - More than 100 children held in a prison celebrated their freedom as US marines rolled into northeast Baghdad amid chaotic scenes which saw civilians loot weapons from an army compound, a US officer said.
Around 150 children spilled out of the jail after the gates were opened as a US military Humvee vehicle approached, Lieutenant Colonel Fred Padilla told an AFP correspondent travelling with the Marines 5th Regiment.
"Hundreds of kids were swarming us and kissing us," Padilla said.
"There were parents running up, so happy to have their kids back."
"The children had been imprisoned because they had not joined the youth branch of the Baath party," he alleged. "Some of these kids had been in there for five years."
The children, who were wearing threadbare clothes and looked under-nourished, walked on the streets crossing their hands as if to mimic handcuffs, before giving the thumbs up sign and shouting their thanks."
"But Walser", you say, "the picture doesn't go with the article you posted."
I beg to differ.
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Now that the Coalition includes the Iraqi people do you think that Garry Trudeau will shut the f*** up? Probably not.
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Tuesday, April 08, 2003
From Ralph Peters in today's New York Post:
"Let's face it. The Iraqi people had their 15 minutes of fame. Insufficiently loyal to Saddam for Hollywood's taste, suffering Iraqis are yesterday's cause.
But a person has to wonder: As they see Iraqi children running out to welcome our troops, don't any of America's critics, foreign or domestic, suspect they might have been wrong about Saddam's innocence?
Guess not. They've moved on. Not one film star is making an effort to go to Iraq to actually do something for the millions who suffered under Saddam. The antiwar movement was a fad for moral lightweights eager to portray themselves as heroes. We all know where the heroes are today. They're in Iraq, making history. Not in film studios."
Indeed®.
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From a reader:
"During World War II Tokyo Rose was the Japanese propaganda voice in the Pacific theatre. In Europe, the turncoat Brit on radio was called Lord Haw-Haw. Now in the same genre we have good old Peter Arnett.....Jackass Pete or Lord Hee-Haw, whichever suits your fancy."
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I guess the MRT will heading down to the job fair in College Station to recruit new headline writers.
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Monday, April 07, 2003
If you discover any more homophonic errors, please advice. Vary Truly You'res, The Editorial Bored, MRT.
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C'mon, Cassandra, everyone knows the duties of the Editor. It is to run the Spell Checker.
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So, tell me again....what are the duties of an editor?
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Sunday, April 06, 2003
So I guess we have sent in Vice. Can Homicide and Internal Affairs be far behind?
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Friday, April 04, 2003
We don't have a tip jar here at Jessica's Well....but we have introduced new products you can buy and help support the site. Check out our new "Democracy! Whiskey! Sexy! products at CafePress. For an explanation of this whole Democracy! Whiskey! Sexy! thing go here (requires registration):
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Thursday, April 03, 2003
Sorry for not posting for a while. You see, I've been incredibly busy lately watching the war unfold before my eyes directly from "the War Center" on Newswest 9. They have this amazing collection of clocks on the wall showing the current time in such far away places as London! They also have a map of the entire country of Iraq on the wall. Other than that I think there is maybe a chair and an ashtray or two to collect the butts from long nights keeping watch over the clocks and map. It looks like they took one corner of the "Weather Lab" to make the "War Center" so I hope we don't get a proportional reduction in weather coverage, which could not be any more thorough, what with the County by County forecast. Some claim that they might be splitting hairs, but hey, if you've got Storm Tracker 9 Live Doppler Nine Thousand - I say go for it! I’d love to keep chatting, but I think one of the clocks in “the War Center” is running slightly fast…I’ll keep you posted.
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Forgive me for being picky, but as noteworthy as the sentiments in the Helen Thomas limericks are, have the writers never heard of meter?
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"Where do they get young men like this?"
This post over at L.T. Smash is getting a lot of air time in the blogosphere.....but it is something that can't get too much exposure so I am posting it also.
UPDATE: I think that this story has turned out to be an urban legend.
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Wednesday, April 02, 2003
Captured correspondence (sort of) from an Iraqi officer. An excerpt:
"My letter informed the great, historic Saddam that the strategic situation is precisely as the great, historic reporter Peter Arnett observed on our TV. Our Republican Guard is defeating -- or at least interrupting -- America's 3rd Infantry Division and 1st Marine Division. Our fedayeen -- culled from the best of Baghdad's underworld gangs -- have so vexed supply lines that for two days the arrogant Marines ate a single meal, and that meal was one of those foul-tasting Meals Ready to Eat like the one we found in the Humanitarian Aid package we shared at our last council meeting. (I did not mention, however, that the Marines appeared to have plenty of ammunition.)"
From Austin Bay. Read the rest here.
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Ladies and Gentlemen, direct from the blogosphere......Helen Thomas limericks!
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Monday, March 31, 2003
Why does every friggin' Nigerian still in Nigeria want me to help them get money out of their country all of a sudden? This ruse must have worked at least once....somewhere....so if you are reading this and you are the one that actually fell for it please go ahead and take yourself out of the gene pool now.
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From reader Suzanne:
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I just love it when Susan Sarandon get busted in the chops.....in the Guardian no less.
"I've just heard a snippet of the most disgustingly me-me-me anti-war advert by Susan Sarandon, in which she intones, "Before our kids start coming home from Iraq in body bags, and women and children start dying in Baghdad, I need to know - what did Iraq do to us?" Well, if you mean what did Saddam do to America The Beautiful, not an awful lot - but to millions of his own people, torture and murder for a start. Don't they count? Surely this is the most self-obsessed anti-war protest ever. NOT IN MY NAME! That's the giveaway. Who gives a stuff about their wet, white, western names? See how they write them so solemnly in a list on the bottom of the letters they send to the papers. And the ones that add their brats' names are the worst - a grotesque spin on Baby On Board, except they think that this gives them extra humanity points not just on the motorway, but in the whole wide weeping, striving, yearning world. We don't know the precious names of the countless numbers Saddam has killed. We're talking about a people - lots of them parents - subjected to an endless vista of death and torture, a country in which freedom can never be won without help from outside."
Read the rest here.
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Thursday, March 27, 2003
From a reader:
What is it they say about politics and bedfello......oh, never mind.
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SEXISM! I was just looking at one of the most common items found in an office environment....the good 'ol Adams carbonless copy phone messge pad. You know how they all have the piece of stiff cardboard in them that keeps you from making too many copies of the message.....well, guess what it has printed on it! Tips on the prevention and detection of breast cancer......which means, of course, that the company that makes them must think that only women womyn take phone messages! Pile out of Augusta ladies, we have a bigger fight to fight!
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Wednesday, March 26, 2003
Nine out of Ten Iraqis welcome U.S. Invasion.
"I AM half Iraqi and residing in Singapore, and I would like to inform all your readers that nine in 10 Iraqis welcome the American invasion of Iraq. The 1/10 are linked to Saddam Hussein's regime. The invasion should be seen through the eyes of the Iraqi people. Whether there is war or no war, Iraqis are dying.
Allow me to recap Saddam's murderous 24 years in power."
Here is the recap.
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Michael Medved nails the Oscars:
"The most prominent personalities in the antiwar movement resist all efforts to classify their angry activism as anti-American. But Sunday night's Oscar extravaganza obliterated such defensive distinctions. For 3 1/2 hours, the entertainment elite indulged in the usual orgy of self-congratulation with only hostile or dismissive reference to epic Iraqi battles involving thousands of U.S. troops. They offered no hint of gratitude, affection, loyalty or connection to the superpower that sustains them."
Read the rest here.
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Tuesday, March 25, 2003
Chirac has warned that France would vote against any U.N. Security Council resolution that would give "the American and British belligerents the right to administer Iraq." If we ever ask the Security Council for another resolution, then I will be out in the street protesting.
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"And thousands of Americans ride alone on to Baghdad." The latest from Victor Davis Hanson.
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Sunday, March 23, 2003
Sometime this weekend we passed 100,000 visitors and 426,000 hits for just 2003.....which is about eight times the traffic we had for all of 2002. Good work guys and gals. I'll post total stats on our upcoming one year birthday on March 29th.
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Saturday, March 22, 2003
A suggestion for the boys over at Get Your OJ. You need to escalate your, uh, process a bit if you really want to get Saddam Hussein to quit gassing Kurds and murdering dissidents. I would suggest that you first increase the font size of the lyrics to "Give Peace A Chance" that you have posted on your site to at least 18 points. If that doesn't work, then add the lyrics to "Imagine". Should that fail, then go full-tilt-boogie and post the lyrics to "We Shall Overcome". And, yes, ALL of them in 18 point type. This is no time for half measures....innocents are dying!! If this still doesn't have any effect........unimaginable.....but if it doesn't, we'll think of something else. Or at least wish that we could.
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Pure Hell? Sitting through a single dinner with her.
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Got some notice from a Mr. Jason Meltzer on the "pro-their-version-of-peace-anyway" web site getyouroj.com for Walsingham calling at least some leftists "ass-hats". Here is part of an entry pulled from his blog:
"Look, everyone wants Saddam out, yes he is a tyrant; it's the process that most people disagree upon."
Boy, wouldn't you like to see a conversation between Mr. Meltzer and whomever it was that the Guardian was quoting (quoted again for convenience below).......an actual Iraqi actually having to pay the price for Mr.Meltzer's idea of "process"?
"....Some of the Iraqis he interviewed on camera "told me they would commit suicide if American bombing didn't start. They were willing to see their homes demolished to gain their freedom from Saddam's bloody tyranny."
And if just this usage of the term ass-hat set him off this way, let us hope he never reads Rachel Lucas.
"Yes, we would very much like to keep your family members out of the plastic shredder....but we have to, you know, use the right process."
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From that well known mouthpiece of The Right......wait for it......The Guardian:
"You just arrived," he said. 'You're late. What took you so long? God help you become victorious. I want to say hello to Bush, to shake his hand. We came out of the grave.'
'For a long time we've been saying: Let them come,' his wife, Zahara, said. 'Last night we were afraid, but we said: 'Never mind, as long as they get rid of him, as long as they overthrow him, no problem'.' Their 29-year-old son was executed in July 2001, accused of harbouring warm feelings for Iran."
Janene Garafalo, call your office.
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Take a look at the above photo of "Americans" protesting the war here in America.
Now compare it with this article. The new American Left meets a new reality.
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Friday, March 21, 2003
Protest this, you leftist ass-hats.
"A group of American anti-war demonstrators who came to Iraq with Japanese human shield volunteers made it across the border today with 14 hours of uncensored video, all shot without Iraqi government minders present. Kenneth Joseph, a young American pastor with the Assyrian Church of the East, told UPI the trip "had shocked me back to reality." Some of the Iraqis he interviewed on camera "told me they would commit suicide if American bombing didn't start. They were willing to see their homes demolished to gain their freedom from Saddam's bloody tyranny. They convinced me that Saddam was a monster the likes of which the world had not seen since Stalin and Hitler. He and his sons are sick sadists. Their tales of slow torture and killing made me ill, such as people put in a huge shredder for plastic products, feet first so they could hear their screams as bodies got chewed up from foot to head."
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Who says the French are useless in the fight against terrorism? This from a reader:
"In a brilliantly conceived military maneuver, six
French protestors inserted themselves into a Paris McDonald’s. Overcoming the fry cooks and cashier, the group proceeded to destroy the onsite weaponry. Forty completed cholesterol bombs were defused and materials for eight hundred more were seized. Also captured were three metal canisters holding 5,000 cubic feet of deadly carbon dioxide, a heavier than air gas that can displace oxygen rich air in low spots causing asphyxiation. The manager claimed it was used for carbonation of beverages. Carbon dioxide is the deadly gas known to coal miners as black damp.
The leader of the group Pepe Petain, known as PP, is the grandson of fearless Marshall Petain of Vichy fame. President Chirac immediately summoned Petain for presentation of the Croix de Guerre. At the ceremony, with fists raised they sounded the new French Battle Cry – La nuit tous les chats sont gris!
Unconfirmed are reports that Pepe Petain has been invited by Gerhard Schroeder to attend his initial meetings for the formation of the Fourth Reich."
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Saddam has declared that he will pay $14,000 for every American killed and $28,000 for any American captured. What are the chances of collecting on that?
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Eric Sigmund at Fire Ant Gazette finds something interesting on Mike Conaway's campaign website.
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From Lileks today:
"Press Conference with Rumsfeld, who really looks as if he has someplace better to be. Usual jabbering blather from the 4th estate. One fellow from Bloomberg asked a two-pronged question - the setup was so interminable the Senate actually moved for cloture. I forget what he wanted to ask, but we were all very impressed with his encyclopedic grasp of the front page of today’s Washington Post, and touched by his conviction that a recitation of the same would cause Rumsfeld to reveal the entire war plan on the spot."
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"How, exactly, will leaving Saddam Hussein in power promote peace and justice in Iraq?" Version 2. Here is a link to the actual transcript of this wonderfully enlightening exchange.
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Thursday, March 20, 2003
Mr. Townsend not only lives in GreenTree but is a member of the GT Estates Homeowners Board of Directors. Other members are Dan Tisdale, Elizabeth Moses, Bill Bucy, Jim Clark, Mary Frances Griffiths, Andy Price, Mark Carr, and Sandra Shiplett. They, along with the Board members from GT North, have gone off like rockets with misinformation and scare notions about the impact of the reliever route on Green Tree. They originally spread the rumor that Tom Craddick owned the land just west of GT and directed the route of the road so as to enrich himself...when presented with the fact that he had sold out his interest to his partners some years ago, they persisted in vilifying his former business partners. The Board has acted irresponsibly, and owes Mr. Craddick an apology. They owe the residents of Green Tree more reasoned direction.
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Wednesday, March 19, 2003
Found in the blogosphere this morning. Author unknown. Hat Tip to Vodkapundit.
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"How, exactly, will leaving Saddam Hussein in power promote peace and justice in Iraq?" A question posed on radio to an anti-war protester by an Iraqi exile. Listen here. (Requires sound).
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Tuesday, March 18, 2003
This from Parody Pages a new blog in Midland:
"My problem is, we are going to go to war without it being the will of the people of The United States Of America. King George has decided he knows whats best for this country. He will protect us from ourselves no matter how much we object, but what more could we expect from a president we never elected?"
I know where he gets the "President we never elected" tripe. That is just your basic Dem bitterness left over from 2000. Bitterness that the Dems thought would be washed away when an angry electorate righted itself in the midterms of 2002. And we all know what happened there. But the part about "going to war without it being the will of the people of the United States of America".......what planet is he living on? But a Midland blog is a Midland blog so I have linked it.
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Want information on how to "Boycott Old Europe". Here is a list of French brands. There is even this flyer in PDF format that you can download and print.
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I really didn't need to look up Mr. Townsend's address in the telephone directory to know that he lives in Greentree. But I did.....and he does.
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Monday, March 17, 2003
Natalie Maines has terribly misjudged her American fans. They are not buying her apology. Perhaps if she showed up at the oval office wearing a thong under a blue dress…
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Site Admin: The maternity ward is moving back to the “main campus” as the original site is now called. Apparently doctors were worried about newborns with serious medical problems having to be transported to the main campus before getting treatment. It makes sense, but it should have occurred to someone before the purchase of Memorial West.
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Friday, March 14, 2003
I liked the Dixie Chicks once. Once. According to news reports, group member Natalie Maines told a London audience:
"Just so you know, we're ashamed the President of the United States is from Texas."
I wonder how much of this is driven by the usual hunger that celebrities have to feel wanted and loved. I wonder because they said this overseas where it would get a different reaction than if they had said it over here, say, while performing at the Grand 'Ol Opry. They start off a new tour in the states on May 1.......in Greenville, South Carolina. Will she repeat herself there?
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Tuesday, March 11, 2003
I am probably late to the party on this.....but I hear that the maternity ward that was relocated to Memorial West after its purchase is now moving back to Memorial. Anyone out there have any scoop on this?
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Monday, March 10, 2003
Walsingham: As almost every teacher will tell you, teaching is one of the few jobs that cannot be evaluated by any objective standard. This applies to tests of new applicants as well as evaluations of practicing teachers. Maybe with a big pay increase more of the applicants will be of higher quality, but by their “logic” we have absolutely no way to know. In the next breath, these same teachers will also tell you that the quality of most teachers is very high now. Huh? I guess they are using some non-objective standard.
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Teachers are headed to Austin to demand things from the taxpayers legislators. This is interesting:
"But teachers may have other complaints to air to lawmakers during the rally, which will begin at noon, including legislation loosening requirements for the non-renewal of a teacher contracts.
The bill, filed by House Public Education Committee chair Kent Grusendorf (R)-Arlington, would allow school boards to fire teachers if their principal determines the termination is in the best interest of students. The bill would also abolish requirements for notification of the non-renewal and prohibit appeal of the action."
We always hear the familiar argument that if we paid better salaries we would attract good teachers.....and this is true. We would attract good teachers. But we would attract bad ones at the same rate.....and once bad ones get in the system it is almost impossible to dislodge them. What is worse is that this drives out the good ones. You can go ahead and add that $5000 per year they are asking for but as long as the hiring (and firing) policies cater to the teacher's unions this will never change.
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Gee, if these Iraqis are mad enough at Saddam to tear down his statues then why on earth were they part of the 100% that voted for him in the last election? Maybe Susan Sarandon can ask......how does The Onion put it....."in that condescending Earth-Mother way of hers."
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From Sunday's Letters to the Editor, reader Scott notices what the Editor doesn't....but then he (Scott) actually reads the letters:
"'Fatal accident causes one to give thanks' is a perverse enough headline to begin with, but then you read the letter. To the best of my reading ability, I can find no one who died in the accident."
and
"Also, the letter under 'Press biased toward pro-America support' seems to be making the opposite point. Perhaps this is all cleverly designed to allow students to check the newspaper for errors. This is suggested by the 10th letter, but that writer takes a shot at Mr. Ott's writing and so cannot be taken seriously."
But at least we are getting Laurels and Darts without the mean streak.
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Saturday, March 08, 2003
Mark Steyn checks in again with a column that has two classic paragraphs:
"My problem with "old Europe" is that it's taken on the characteristic of its capital's most famous statue: a small boy who just stands there pissing 24 hours a day."
and this on one hit hanger-oner Mike Farrell:
"You remember Mike Farrell. He’s the guy who played the guy who wasn't Alan Alda in M*A*S*H. No, no, not the guy who played Trapper John. Trapper John left after the second season and some other fellow took over, and people spent the next 20 years saying he wasn’t as good as Trapper John. Mike Farrell played that guy. Not the guy you remember, but the guy you remember for not being as good as the guy you remember."
Years ago, even before I knew Mike Farrell's politics I thought that. Two shows in to the third season I sorely missed Wayne Rogers. Read the rest here.
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Friday, March 07, 2003
Lileks....again. This time on the President's press conference last night.
"Stirring rhetoric would have been nice, but stirring rhetoric frightens the Europeans, much as the sound of a newfangled motorcar makes the horses nervous."
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KUDOS TO MYWESTEXAS.COM!. If you ever wanted to try blogging you can at least practice over at the MyWestTexas.com website. I am ashamed to say I didn't notice when they did this but they have provided the ability for readers to add comments on the end of individual stories. This is a great idea. They should pursue it even further and have a weekly print feature of Best Comments from the web.
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I hope they see one. I want to see what happens when a trucker grabs 'holta (catches) a terrorist.
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You have to love the "Human Shields" for what they (un-intentionally) pointed out about the difference between the U.S. and Saddam Hussein. They head over there in their double decker London buses to act as shields for things like hospitals and schools, etc. Upon arrival they are alarmed to find out that the Iraqis want to place them at things like oil refineries and power plants.....you know, something that may actually be bombed. Of course, they don't actually want to do anything dangerous so they pack up and, at last check, were able to get about one-third of the way home before running out of money.
But before leaving they were able to show to the entire world what they (no America lovers they) thought the chances of being injured by the Great Satan America really were when hanging out next to hospitals and schools. We have to thank them for that.
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Thursday, March 06, 2003
I've just returned from a Peace Now meeting in Santa Fe and have enlisted as a human shield for deployment in Iraq. The Iraqi government has given me a plum assignment – I will be stationed at the refinery outside Baghdad. Walser, they have one spot open at the Baby Formula Factory. Are you in?
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Wednesday, March 05, 2003
On the nightgowns.....are they willing to stipulate that Mister Gest has never worn them?
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In today's edition of the MRT as a special tribute to deceased Councilman James Bradford, we chose to print a photograph of the actual James Bradford, rather than a photo of Commissioner Mike Bradford, even though they share the same last name, and the commissioner is much more photogenic than the councilman. It is hoped that our decision does not offend our readers who are unaccustomed to such pains-taking accuracy in these pages.
Sincerely,
Lil S. Wonder, Manager
Photo Editorial Board
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Ok. I won't tell you where this charity auction is being held, nor for whom because it is a good cause......but......Oh. My. God.
"You break into her movie star trailer, there it is! Liza with a Z's Red Nightgown! You grab it and run! You are her biggest fan, after all! You deserve it! But crime doesn't pay, Liza needs her space and you don't want to do stalker jail time because you can buy it here!"
"You weren't on the Gest List for Liza's wedding in New York. Get over it. You can see what all the bedroom excitement is about anyway. Mrs. Gest looks wonderful in it! Classic Collector garment worn by a legendary national treasure known as Liza Minnelli!"
And yes, that is the actual descriptive text supplied for these auction items.
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Tuesday, March 04, 2003
Councilman James Bradford is dead. I had read that he was in the hospital but this is a shock.
UPDATE: More here.
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Martin Sheen
Actor and Hollywood Ass-Hat*
Uh, Mr. Sheen, if you make yourself un-bankable as a star that is not the same thing as being blacklisted. And just why do these ass-hats in Hollywood continue to think that the only bad thing about communism was the resultant anti-communism that caused Dalton Trumbo and Ring Lardner, Jr. to have to ghost write for a few years?
* I am keeping the phrase "Hollywood Ass-Hat" alive while Rachel Lucas is on hiatus.
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If I am reading this article correctly, the City Councill will soon be looking for people to serve on the Midland/Odessa Urban Transit Board that, basically, possess the business skills to ensure that the losses will be kept to an absolute minimum.
I loved this line in the article:
"The struggle for bus transit ended earlier this month when the Council voted 4-3 in favor of the transit system."
No. I am afraid that the struggle has just begun.
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Sunday, March 02, 2003
Jessica's Well in the Blogosphere Ecosystem: #346 With A Bullet.
OK, #346, anyway.
UPDATE: Maybe just a bullet. The list appears to be pretty dynamic and growing. We have moved down (now #608) but the list itself has grown mightily. Oh, well......"it is an honor just to be mentioned."
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Whoa! Kerry Phillips is a babe!
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KMID-TV re-designed their website. Looks much better.
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Inbound e-mail from Jessica's Well reader George:
"Dear Jessicaswell:
A Midland blog - wow! This is better than an oil well!
Anyway, I did a page search on your blog for the word "Patel" and didn't find it. So I assume you haven't discussed
Dipak Patel, M.D.
It must have been quite a scene at the local jail when his representative brought in $2.5 million cash to post his bond. So, now that he has jumped bail, which local, state or federal government agency gets that forfeited bond money?
I don't know, and you may not know, but it's something we should probably be curious about."
That is a good question.
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Saturday, March 01, 2003
Usually I have to beat you guys with sticks to post on a regular basis and since I announced our 78,000 visitors since January 1 suddenly everyone is posting again. You are all such Ho's.
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Carroll Thomas is out of the race to replace Larry Combest leaving only, at last count, about 35 other people. My early prediction: It will come down to either Mr. Conaway or Mr. Isett.
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Update for Rolf from Belgium: Mom says "Baaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh".
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From Letters to the Editor Manuel Lujan writes:
"With the opportunity to elect competent and progressive City Council members, will those who possess these qualities heed the call or will we be subject to the same cast of characters?"
Competent and progressive? Is that possible? Run, Manuel, Run!
Also from Letters to the Editor:
"Public transportation is the dividing line between a major city from a small city. If we had just one bus holding 50 work commuters, there would be 50 less cars on the road. We'd have more parking. We'd have less pollution. Now take that one bus and multiply it by 10 or 50."
I have sinking feeling that our actual outcome will be closer to having fifty buses with one rider each. To their credit, Mayor Canon and Councilmen Dufford and Perry knew that this will be the eventual outcome and voted against the proposal.
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Friday, February 28, 2003
Nice of the MRT to hand out a Laurel to one of its own, the departing Meta Minton. But it appears that in her absence, no one is manning the editorial helm. This little gem appears in today’s MRT concerning the Tetraco fire:
"One week ago today, the plant combusted into flames as employees managed to get out and help warn neighboring residents to evacuate the area."
Geez, Louise…….what do you think we thought it combusted into…..poodles?
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I was lucky enough to have been able to see an actual "Anti-War" protest the other week. It struck me then that the protest was much more Anti-Bush than Anti-War. It was very clear that these people hate Bush even more than they hate war.......Kosovo and Bosnia was "war" wasn't it? Sorties. Bombs. Boots on the ground. But that didn't break anyone out of the faculty lounges, now did it? James Lileks, as usual, finds the words:
".....and everyone's horrified that we've raised our hand to strike. Why? Perhaps because it's Bush who's made the decision to act.
I get this feeling, over and over again: it is better that the right thing never come to pass than let the wrong men make it happen."
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Right now this DMMD thing is being billed as a plan where downtown property owners elect to "chip in" to create a fund to help improve downtown. An indication of the true nature of this plan will be whether unwilling downtown property owners can opt out of the plan. My guess is no. At which point it becomes a tax increase, albiet one for just the downtown area. But here is the big question: Can this thing that would be a de facto tax increase just be created (at the behest of just a few) by the State and run by the City with no vote or referendum at the local level? Paranoia is kicking in.....I need more details.
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